About blogging (reflections)

so it seems that my blogging (at least assigned blogging) is drawing to a close. I had some fun, some laughs, some random moments and some serious ones. I regret nothing that I have chosen to share with you all. I really enjoy blogging and will most likely continue to do so in the future. It has provided me with an emotional outlet, a chance to vent and sometimes a chance to entertain others. I would like to hope that I have taught you all a little something, whether it be about relationships or shrinkage or the incompetence of the Grand Forks School Systems. If I have failed to teach you anything then please say I made you laugh AT LEAST once??!! Please??....

Because I can

My choice huh? That's ironic considering I have nothing I want to say. the kids are fine, I am for the most part fine, school is fine. nothing really to complain about. but on the flip side nothing really to get excited about. my life is mundane today. Check that, there is one thing that really irks me. All the Osama Bin Laden BS on facebook.  I am so fed up with all the nonsense that I am almost ready to delete my account. yes he's dead, but has justice REALLY been served? should we be celebrating his death or should we be on the lookout for the heir to the throne? I am also fed up with the BS bickering about whether or not Obama is awesome. Ok HE didn't kill Osama, it just happened during his presidency. So all the people out there talking about how awesome he is really ticks me off. BUT the Obama haters tick me off too, because they are slamming him because he didn't kill Osama himself and the military ALMOST went without pay because of him and they still won't vote for him and bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch. There are far too many people in this country to please everyone, we probably can't even have a happy medium. I just want people to quit arguing about Obama and whether or not he is awesome for "catching" OBL and just take the whole thing as a win for the country. So now that I have bitched about their bitching, I am done now. and I do feel a little better actually.

Sense

Sense sense! this doesn't make any sense! tell me where did I go wrong? how did my life come to this? I am about to embark on the hardest journey of my life but that's ok. it doesn't make sense to you and it barely makes sense to me. I know I am doing the right thing, even though it doesn't seem like it to those around me

remembered dialogue

Preacher: Do you take this woman to have and to hold? for richer or poorer? in sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?
Matt: I do
Preacher: And do you take this man to have and to hold? for richer or poorer? in sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?
Me: I do
Preacher: By the power vested in me by the State of North Dakota I now pronounce you husband and wife. you may now kiss the bride.

That worked out great, h-uh?

"Barely Used" (Short Story Blog)

Amy sat at the counter of her cluttered kitchen, rolling a cigarette between her fingers. She drew it up to her lips and took a long drag. The phone rang, startling her. She reached over the clutter and picked up the receiver.
"Hello."
"Yes, I am calling about the ad in the paper" a gruff male voice replied. "How much you asking?"
Amy sighed. "I don't know, 50 bucks?"
"Is it in good condition?"
"Yeah, it's barely been used."
"Sounds fair. When can I pick it up?"
"I'm home all day. 135 Oak Drive"
"I know where that is. I will be there in about an hour."
"Sounds good. What's your name?"
"John."

An hour later a small black truck backed down Amy's winding driveway. An older gentleman with short gray hair and a bushy beard got out of the truck and approached the door. Amy, in frumpy sweats, opened the door before he even had a chance to ring the bell.
"You must be John" she said happily.
"Yeah, I sure am. Do you mind if I ask why you are selling it?"
"Not at all, come on in. We actually inherited it but have no real use for it. The one we have works quite well."
John cocked an eyebrow.
"You inherited it?"
Amy rolled her eyes and grinned.
"Odd I know. It would make more sense if you knew my in laws. I think they enjoy dumping these things on us."

Several minutes later John loaded a new white toilet onto the back of his truck.

Sometimes, life hurts

this seems like a "duh" statement. this is something that we all (probably) take as a given. Sometimes, life hurts. While speaking to a very close friend of mine yesterday he informed me of this. once again a "duh" statement, and I recognized this but something about that statement struck me in a profound way.

I have in recent times, found myself to be in a hurtful and extremely complicated situation. I have made the decision to move on but the guilt I feel is quite crippling. I know I've made mistakes and that a large part of this IS in fact my fault. Maybe it's my fault even more so for giving up. I recognize this and accept my responsibility in this situation's demise, however I have learned something quite important. Relationships, sex, marriage and love are NOT as black and white as society would have us believe, and a person's past doesn't always define their future. I used to think love and sex and etc... was black and white, I used to strongly believe the phrase "once a cheater always a cheater" but the truth of the matter is that every situation is different and every person is different. These things are NOT black and white, but have an entire gray side to them. Only by opening our minds and placing our reservations and judgements aside can we really understand that.

Yes, it is very easy to judge and place blame but the fact remains that when a relationship of any kind goes bad it is very very rarely ever entirely one person's fault. only when both parties accept their part in the demise can true healing and understanding begin. If that happens then the parties involved are fortunate to have grown as individuals. They are fortunate enough to realize that just because something ended badly doesn't mean that it was necessarily a mistake to begin with, or that it (relationship) or they failed. Sometimes what we learn and how we grow as people is the best side effect to come out of a relationship or decision.

I sound very preachy right now and I realize that. I have had some very different and interesting life experiences in the past few years. I have some very important people come into my life (along with my experiences) that have taught me the things I mentioned above. I have grown remarkably and become a much more mature and grounded person (I realize it doesn't seem that way but you will have to take my word on it!). I could go into more detail but I fear that would go on too long. I am, however, very willing to discuss this topic further in person. I just want to leave you with these words:

"Sometimes, life hurts. But it isn't a problem, it's a learning opportunity". (collaborative quote from Pearson and Lyons)

New puppy and itchy feet

So I acquired a new puppy yesterday. My friend got him then realized she couldn't care for him so she brought him to me. He's a red male husky, 6 weeks old. Obviously I am currently brushing up on my Siberian Husky facts and training. I think I may train him to pull (after all, it's in his blood). He's quite vocal so needless to say I didn't get much sleep last night. The little sleep I did get was only cuz I slept with Tonka on the couch...he sleeping NEAR my feet so I'm not sure why it happened, but I suddenly had  itchy feet. like insanely itchy feet! but I didn't want to move and wake the little monster up so I tried to deal, DIDN'T WORK! I had to move to scratch my itchy feet and woke him up! DOH! I used to always associate itchy feet with things like athlete's foot (gross) or dry skin and stuff like that. Now I think I most likely associate itchy feet with dogs. weird. he's cute though huh? maybe itchy feet is worth it.

Sohmer (I love that guy)

So the more and more that I read of Least I Could Do and the more I read Sohmer's notes and little comments throughout the strip the more I am convinced that this man is pretty much my other half. We are so so so sooooo alike. It's like we share a brain, it's actually slightly creepy. Creepy because we are so much alike, and creepy that there is another person just like me out there in the world! Him and I are SO much alike that I am beginning to wonder if I had sex with him if it would be considered a masturbatory act... I would very much like the opportunity to disprove this, however.

wow. just wow.

So it occurred to me that the term "shrinkage" doesn't only have to refer to the shortening a guy's penis, but can also refer to cooking bacon. Although, they are similar. They both mean, loosely translated, "less meat". Yup, I just crossed the line and I know it. And I'm not even drunk yet.






 The more you know.

hundreds

a hundred things I like and a hundred things I don't like. Really Jen? A hundred each? alright, you have no one to blame but yourself...
LIKES/LOVES
1. PUPPIES
2. Futurama
3. Jaiden
4. Cora
5. Lee
6. Kika
7. yellow
8. pizza
9. sweatshirts
10. being lazy
11. Tae Kwon Do
12. Robert Downey Jr.
13. The Hangover
14. Play-Doh
15. Texas Roadhouse
16. My other animals
17. My friends
18. Kenny Johnson
19. Holly Hunter
20. Saving Grace
21. board games
22. Rock Band
23. puzzles (sometimes)
24. tattoos
25. Rum
26. Gin
27. Vodka
28. flavored vodkas
29. Crown Royal
30. bed straps and handcuffs
31. karaoke
32. a night away from the kids
33. FRIENDS (TV show)
34. Roseanne
35. Simpsons
35. Family Guy
36. Facebook
37. White Fang
38. sledding
39. camping
40. Despicable Me
41. driving around for no reason
42. being awesome
43. writing
44. making movies
45. doggie style
46. football
47. volleyball
48. wolves
49. sleep
50. baking
51. long showers
52. Cadbury Eggs
53. raspberries
54. chili
55. Lake Placid
56. sex (I'm a big fan)
57. great big fuzzy blankets
58. laughing
59. music
60. Reba (both her show and her music)
61. How I met Your Mother
62. The Shield
63. Rescue Me
64. Denis Leary
65. hiking
66. swimming
67. bar fights
68. "I've never" (drinking game)
69. 69
70. Poker (all forms)
71. rummy (all forms)
72. Rayne Summers (Least I Could Do)
73. casual sex
74. hot chocolate
75. cheesecake
76. animals
77. tanzinite
78. black diamonds
79. trying new things
80. some routines
81. winning
82. spending time with the kids (usually)
83. candles
84. roses
85. warm weather
86. watching the cat harass the rat (it amuses me)
87. Liar Liar
88. Jim Carrey
89. In the Army Now
90. when teachers yell and hit the board (that also amuses me)
91. Neil Patrick Harris
92. Calvin and Hobbes
93. Garfield
94. Fox Trot
95. Bra Man
96. girl on top
97. sexual innuendos
98. rocking chairs
99. night time
100. "less talky more back scratchy"

DISLIKES/HATES
1. snakes
2. spiders
3. crabby kids
4. math
5. puzzles (sometimes)
6. reading
7. being stalked
8. rat bites
9. donkey punching (not a fan)
10. listing my likes and dislikes on a blog
11. Valentine's Day
12. watching any sport other than football
13. scotch
14. extreme heat
15. extreme cold
16. North Dakota
17. Minnesota
18. political emails
19. emails titles "smart squirrel". yeah squirrels are smart and resourceful if you want to entertain me then  send me an email titled "dumb squirrel". that'll get my attention
20. spam
21. being hacked
22. Star Wars
23. Sci Fi in general
24. running out of Cadbury Eggs
25. facing mortality
26. being told "no"
27. that my tattoo is cracked and bleeding
28. naughty children
29. other parents because they don't get off their asses and do some damn parenting! Say, is that your kid up on the roof with a deer rifle???
30. stupid people
31. tests
32. cleaning cat boxes
33. cleaning the rat cage
34. picking up dog poop
35. washing dishes
36. Altru health system
37. death/dying
38. people being in "my bubble" (unless I know them and am cool with them)
39. crowds
40. waiting
41. shopping
42. closed minded people
43. having sex with the lights on
44. wasting booze (not OK)
45. my thighs
46. taking pictures (unless I'm BEHIND the camera)
47. cooking
48. long car drives with kids
49. being broke
50. having to be nice to someone I loathe
51. my son is being a total butt right now as I try to type, not happy with that
52. AT&T
53. The fact that I will be stuck with AT&T
54. sucking up
55. potty training the kids
56. fighting with friends
57. running out of gas
58. the ban of prayer in schools
59. politicians
60. Government policies
61. traveling overseas
62. California
63. Florida
64. changing diapers
65. vomit
66. being sick
67. cracked ribs
68. broken noses
69. Superman
70. the way Hollywood always screws up the superheros
71. the way Hollywood is always rebooting story lines they don't to because they are too lazy to come up with something new. Come talk to me! I'll give you lots of new stuff!
72. Anime
73. Hello Kitty
74. bad drivers. it's called a STOP sign, you aer supposed to STOP. Asshole.
75. pleather
76. dry roasted peanuts
77. Elmo's World
78. Mr. Noodle
79. Tomatoes
80. sea food
81. losing
82. crying
83. working
84. penalties called on my team
85. Gophers
86. citing
87. yappy dogs (even though I own one)
88. bartenders who don't know the difference between Jack Daniel's and Crown Royal
89. being stood up/blown off
90. babysitting
91. baseball hats
92. flea epidemics
93. the ocean
94. bridges
95. my OCD
96. ADD
97. public schools
98. fine china
99. cigarettes
100. yodeling

Discussion time

Random thought of the day. All dogs go to heaven. Is Cujo in heaven? thoughts anyone???

ranting

in case anyone was wondering, the Grand Forks Public School system are a joke! their teachers are lazy and incompetent and they don't believe in disciplining kids. A great example of their lack of competency...my daughter has brought home several spelling tests this year where she missed several words and should have failed the test, but instead the teacher gives her an 'A' to "encourage her" to do better. That doesn't encourage her to do jack shit! all that is doing is teaching her that she doesn't have to study and take the consequences of not studying. This worthless teacher isn't doing my daughter (and presumably other kids as well) any favors by giving them false As.
A great example of their lack of discipline is this. My daughter has been tardy 8 times this year. I have tried taking care of this by moving her bedtime up to 7:30 and making her get up at 6. But that hasn't worked. The school doesn't hand out detention or make her stay in at recess or write lines or anything! they just send me some lame ass letter about how the "stay in school intervention team" and social services are getting involved! Bullshit! she doesn't need an intervention team, she needs some god damn discipline at school! there hasn't been any as of yet and my punishing her at home clearly isn't working. The first line of defense, so to speak, needs to come from the school. They need to try something first BEFORE I punish her at home. even if it is as simple as keeping her in at recess on days she is tardy to make up for the time she missed. I'm not going to stand over her shoulder every minute of the day and make her do what she is supposed to do, she needs to learn to be responsible and she WILL learn that if she is made to be accountable for her actions, both at home and at school.
The school teachers forge grades, refuse to discipline and ignore valid concerns from both parents and students, then they can't figure out why the hell the kids are rude, lazy, inconsiderate and irresponsible! maybe they should get their heads out of their asses, stop worrying about being negative and trying to sugar coat every damn thing and TEACH the kids and DISCIPLINE them when they are out of line. Seriously, 15 years from now these kids are gonna be the ones in charge of the country, are these the attitudes and values we want them to have when they are in charge of us?

memory

Favorite memory? I don't know that I have one. Right now I'm trying even to pin down a good memory. I suppose the day I found out I was having twins or maybe even the day they were born would be good ones, though rather cliched. Hmm, how the day we got our new puppy? Little background as to why this was awesome. Cora was over a year old and flat out refused to put any weight on her legs. She couldn't walk, but she wouldn't even stand. Her doctor and infant development workers were so concerned about this that they put her into physical therapy convinced something was medically wrong with her. This will come into play later in the story I promise.
So, I'm on petfinder.com trying to find the perfect puppy for us (with the help of Nickala of course!) and I came across a litter of puppies that were half St. Bernard and half Springer Spaniel. What a combo! Couldn't pass that up. So without even warning my hubby I put in an application on a female pup. The next I received a call saying we were approved for adoption! oh and by the way, the shelter we were adopting from was in Waterloo Iowa!! What a drive! so three weeks later, after the pups were deemed healthy Nikki and I drove down to Waterloo to pick her up. We left at 5 am Sunday morning. We got back into town at 2 am Monday morning, oh and we both had 8 am classes that morning. I dont' recall why I decided to go to class that morning, oh wait yes I do, I had a test. So I go to classes and come home. the new puppy who I have name Kika is lying on the couch. As I stand there watching, Cora crawls over to the couch, grabs on and STANDS UP and says "hi puppy"! It blew my mind. Apparently it isn't that she couldn't walk, she just didn't have the proper motivation to until we got Kika.

and I quote...

I was going to go with "naked time is not thinky time" but that would get way too obscene way too quickly. I think I will use the quote "ask not what you can do with no pants, ask what no pants can do for you". ok in all honesty this will probably get obscene too. both quotes are from my new love in life, Rayne Summers, star of the webcomic 'Least I Could Do'. It is so sad that he is fictional....It is wonderful that he hates the oppression of pants, cuz Hell, who needs pants?! Pants make it much harder to indulge in all the wonderful things in life like showers and sex. Ok, you COULD shower with pants on but what would be the point? it would be highly uncomfortable. And as for sex that would be impossible!! Hmmm, I will stop talking about this topic immediately so I don't cross the line even farther. If you are interested in the non censored ranting about sex and no pants and booze and what not feel free to find me on Facebook!

crabby today

I WAS having a good day, but now I am crabby. not really sure why I am crabby, perhaps because the kids are being horrid little monsters and driving me nuts, or because my side and back hurt considerably more the last couple of days, or both. but whatever I am royally pissed the eff off today. so count your lucky stars that you only have to read about it and not deal with it first hand!

Why don't they make Garanimal clothing for adults?

Has it ever occurred to them that maybe adults need help accessorizing their wardrobe too?? I need a closet, organized only with Garanimals clothing. So when I am getting ready for the day and picking an outfit I look at the tags and match the animals. If I pull out and elephant shirt then I know I can find any pair of pants with an elephant on the tag and I am good to go, and I don't have worry in the back of my head for the rest of the day about whether or not I match. Although, knowing me and nonconformist attitude, I would probably try to make an elephant and a tiger match and spend the rest of the day getting weird looks and snickers. Then I would probably punch someone. Oh yeah, I also have ODD, or at least that's what I've been told. Screw it, my wardrobe is fine the way it is. 

And we're in the Superbowl!!

Packers destroyed the Bears today procuring a spot in the Superbowl! I can't help gloating simply because I never learned how to win graciously. I will gloat and talk trash and throw it in the face of every Vikings fan I come across for the next two weeks! Let's go Greenbay!!!!!

why fix something if it isn't broke??

I am so beyond tired of Northland and their constant "upgrades" to their damn email system. There is nothing wrong with the one we just had, or the one we had 4 months ago or the one we had 6 months before that! Not all of us are computer savvy, so holy crap just leave it alone!!! it's FINE the way it is!!!!

Blogasize

How to Blogasize:

1. Link to the person who tagged you
2. Post these rules on your blog
3. Tell about your six quirks, see below.
4. Tag three bloggers to do the same
5. Leave them a comment to let them know you’ve tagged them
I'm pretty OCD: I'm a constant checker, I count steps and when eating things like gummi bears or M&Ms I separate out the colors. I eat the ones I like least, then next least and so on and so forth

I'm terrified of bridges: I had a reoccurring nightmare as a small child which has led to this irrational fear. That bridge collapsing in Minneapolis a few years back didn't help either.

I can either be the nicest person you've ever met, or the biggest bitch you've ever met. But that all depends on you...

I LOVE controversy and discussions. I live for controversial discussions!!! In reality I should be going into law or politics but I am not, for various reasons that I will not bore you with right now.

I still believe that disciplining a child works. I am, apparently, one of the few parents left on earth that still does. I'm also a firm believer in tough love.

I have a very low tolerance for bullshit and game playing. So if you do things prepared to be called out.

Why I Write

There are many probable reasons as to why I write, or at least write for fun and not out of obligation. It is most likely because I view it as an outlet, a healthy one (usually)to bitch and moan or express myself and my opinions and views. Sometimes I write merely out of boredom or for the entertainment of others. I really do enjoy writing my stories and poems and screenplays, I think mainly because I can create characters as I see fit and put them into situations that I feel they need to be in, or put them into situations and explore how they get themselves out of those situations. In short they are the puppets and I am the puppet master. I can make them dance around on my paper or skydive or be lovers or haters. I can live my unfulfilled dreams through the characters I create. I have fun writing. I have fun creating. So presumably that is the biggest reason why I write.